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Our Russian Dating
Scam Guide
"How to protect yourself from online dating scams"
Dating scams are most of the time organized by men pretending to be Russian women seeking love!
Do not think a Russian woman will fall
in love with you after 2 weeks. Scam artists do!
Please, do yourself a big favor and read this whole Antiscam mini guide,
it can save you from a lot of emotional damage and financial
problems.
The
U.S. Embassy receives reports almost every day of fraud
committed against U.S. citizens by Internet correspondents
professing love and romantic interest. But if you are not a an
U.S. Citizen, then this warning counts for any person from any
country who wants
to contact a Russian woman with the purpose for romance!
This is why we have created this topic
Anti
Scam rule #1:
Never send money to a
woman listed in any kind of internet dating or matchmaking agency,
if she asks for it.
Report any suspicious cases related to this rule.
NEW!
Magic visas for Russian brides
Tips and information why Russian brides can't get business or
tourist visas to enter the United States
Content of our Antiscam guide
Ever received a letter like this?
..........I always think about our meeting. By the way I know a
travel agency here, that can organize the trip to your country
very quickly. They make visa, foreign passport, buy the tickets
and even find a hotel where I can stay. I think it will be
a good idea to use the service of this agency. What do you think
about it?."..............
If yes, then stop! if no, then put these words right above your
computer, in
case you will receive a letter similar like this.
When to be careful
or even suspicious
(these indicated signs are not enough to protect yourself
from being scammed, they are just some possible red-flags. Please read the whole topic about dating
scams)
-
The person is contacting 'you' (most of the scammers look
for their 'victim' on (free) post-your-profile dating sites
where men and women freely can post their ad without being
checked/verified by a human being).
-
The person starts to use 'popular language' to impress
you.
-
The person writes in pretty well English
-
The person falls in love with you (very quick and
sometimes even within 2, 3 weeks).
-
The person wants to visit you (which is NOT possible for
at least US & Canada and for other western countries
without personal involvement of your country's Embassy).
-
The person lost her job or needs medical support and needs money.
-
The person uses an Internet café and needs money
(sometimes the 'manager' of a Internet café is even
contacting you to help her).
-
The person has no postal address or phone number to
reach her. Question about personal information that you can
verify are not very welcome and she will
try to avoid or ignore those questions, or tell you that this is not important
for you to know.
-
The person is avoiding or not answering your specific
questions (which you ask to know her better). If you ask
specific questions and the person doesn't want to answer
them, the person often starts to ask new questions in
return, with the purpose to change the subject (that the
person doesn't want to talk about).
-
The person will be offended or feels insulted when
asking personal questions or 'proof' that can lead to her real
identification.
-
The person avoids the subject to meet her in her country
or tells you that she can better visit you.
-
The 'person'(*) needs more money for her (magic) visa (or
tickets) to visit you
because her own savings are not enough and a 'friendly' local
travel office can help her with that. (Single Russian women
NEVER can get a visa without your personal involvement and
NEVER can get a visa to travel to (for example) the US as a
tourist. Magic visa's are not existing!)
(*) I use on purpose the words 'the
person', because most of these 'scammers' are men pretending to be Russian woman and who are using stolen photo's from
professional models or women
from real agencies.
There are so
many single beautiful women and so many Dating Agencies. Are they all real
and above all, reliable?
In
general I can say, Yes!, more specific I can say for 99.5% (according to
reliable sources). But this still means that it could be possible
to come across one of the 0.5%. For
example, some web sites have over 20.000 profiles, however this is not a
reason to find any scam inside this Agency, it only gives you an
impression how many profiles you can find on the 'entire' web.
So, the chance is present, but if you prepare yourself in a proper way, the
risk of being scammed can be reduced to almost zero.
One
of my favorite quoted expression is:
"By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail."
(Benjamin Franklin - 1706-1790)
In
general there
are two categories of scam examples:
-
A
single person (or criminal organization) who use pictures and biography information of
non-existing women who deliberately wants to swindle you.
-
A
criminal organization that exposes themselves as a 'real' Dating Agency that deliberately wants to swindle
you.
-
Or a co-operation between these two.
But there are also many variants, that are 'close' to swindle practices,
but not (yet) labeled as real illegal organizations. These are organizations
that will use methods to keep you as long as possible as a paid customer,
or those who ask far too much money for their services. or those that
insist in a aggressive way to buy products or services from them which you
never need. And you, blind of love, thinking about that beautiful young
woman, are an easy potential victim for them. From a legal point of view
they are no swindlers, but from my personal view they are.
Now you probably ask yourself 'what
can you do for me?'.
Well that is very simple, I want to protect you for any kind of possible
scam. 'Can you do that for me?, no, just for the simple reason I
can't verify every step you make, but 'can
I do this myself?',
YES!.
Just read everything of this topic, follow my advises, suggestions,
remember my information, print it out or come back now and then, but visit also my
recommended resources, including my recommendations to provide yourself
with tools or services that are created by professionals.
'Oh, you want to sell me something', certainly not in the first
place, the information in our website could be sufficient for you, if you
just use your common sense and normal knowledge of human character, keep
both feet on ground and if you are not too credulous, then it's already a
start. But if this and all our other information is not enough for you to
feel yourself 'well prepared' and certain then you always can decide to
provide yourself with more information, tools or services. It's you who
has to make the choices, but making the wrong choice can cost you a lot of
money. Better be sure than sorry, so don't leave right now, we are not
finished yet. And if you are satisfied with our contents, please spread
the word, I always feel sad if I receive emails starting with 'I wished
I had found your website sooner...'
Here are some tips to start with, these tips
are an extract of parts of the subjects described in this topic.
Tip 1
Do not use any free dating site where women can contact you first. These
sites are the hot-beds of dating scammers. Any person can signup here
complete anonymous (use any free email address and fake personal
information). Even when you have to pay to be a member (for receiving
emails) on these free dating sites, don't use it if you are serious in
looking for a new life partner. Only use real,
professional and
verifiable agencies.
Tip
2
Check the agency
If
you visit the website of some Dating Agency, try to read all the information
about this website before you start to browse through the ad's. Perhaps their
introduction or 'About-Us' pages or other relevant pages could give you some
background information of this specific Dating Agency, which could give you a
'good' or perhaps 'wrong' feeling about this site and their
services. Also try to find out if they are a member of the Anti Scam
Program. You can also first visit our recommended
agencies
that you can find in this topic.
Tip
3
Write a detailed
introduction letter (preferable translated in Russian), to receive
a detailed reply of the woman
If
you write your Russian lady for the first (introduction letter) time, please write a
detailed letter about yourself.
For the woman it's important to
see
that the man who is writing
to her is serious
about finding a new partner. To be very serious in your intentions and to be
very open to her, gives you a response which you can analyze as
reliable or not. Important is to see how your mutual correspondence is
developing, about what kind of subjects you both are
talking.
But if the woman starts (in an early state) with questions
concerning money, for any kind of reason,
than you have to be careful and you have to analyze if these questions has
anything to do with the situation you and your correspondent are aware of. Try
to find out if her letters to you are very personal and don't look
like standard generated letters.
Persons who are just trying to get your money are
using pre-defined letters, just because they don't have the time to write each
person in a personal way. These persons mostly don't answer your specific
questions
and don't give much personal information, but use general (predefined) text for their letters. This is
at least a
sign that you have to be careful.
Tip 4
Ask specific
questions and check if you receive answers on these questions
In
case you are using an Agency with email forwarding or other mail-services, and
your correspondent is not responding on your specific personal questions, this
could be a sign of being suspicious. Another important thing is to confirm
with her if your (original) letters indeed are reaching her. Try to send
copies of your original letters using postal mail or a fax machine at her
office (if possible) and ask her if these letters are the same she received
through the Dating Agency you are using. I know examples that some
Dating Agencies, with this kind of services, can create additional questions
or add more text to your letters or even change your letters, just for the reason
to keep you as long as possible as their customer. One of the most important
thing is to try to get her on the phone now and then, in this way you can
confirm your and her letters to each other.
Tip 5
Read our complete
topic about dating scams
Read our complete information page about Dating scams
and related topics. You will learn more about the Russian-women-
dating-world in common. Being prepared is being halfway your success in
finding you Russian lady.
Tip 6
Use only 100% reliable
agencies
If you are really looking for absolute reliable,
professional Agencies which covers all the needs you have related to
finding a Russian woman, then we highly recommend you the most reliable
Agency you can find in this business. We are a
European
representative of Elenas Models. You
will feel very comfortable after reading the
backgrounds of this agency. After finishing reading
all the information of her site, you can start to
look for your Russian dream without any risk, the only risk you will have is
that some beautiful Russian woman will fall in love with you!
Tip 7
Always show your honesty
to her
Always
show your honesty first to her. Don't think they will trust you right away
after your first contact to her. Dating Scams not only overcome men, but also
to many women. Unfortunately there are also men who are trying unwanted
approaches to the woman and sometimes these approaches are going very far.
Tip 8
How can I check if
she is real
For you and your girlfriend it's important to know if you both are
'real'. Not only for you, but for the woman you are writing this is important
too. At some specific stage during your correspondence there will be a
moment that you (or she) will ask yourself, 'is she/he real or not'
. We receive many letters with questions 'how can I check or get
proof that the lady I am writing is true and/or honest'. There
are many ways to do this, but most of these ways will cost you money
too. But better spending some money for a background
check then multiple times for 'nothing' and a lot of frustration
and disappointment.
But one thing you can first do by yourself, just tell her (not during
your first or second letter to her!) that you will send a (scanned) copy
of your passport to her, just to show her your trust to her and ask her
to do the same for you and explain to her, that by doing this, you both
will have a more comfortable feeling about your new relationship. It is
better that you take this initiative to first send your copy of your
passport, in this way she will have no reason to believe to be insulted
by asking only her copy of her passport. If she did send you pictures of
her, then she also can send you a scanned copy of her passport. Using
this tip, you can at least compare her pictures with the picture on her
passport and will see her real address and birth date, that is printed
in her passport. This kind of 'proof' is not 100%, but it is a start and
it is always good to know to see how her reaction will be if you ask her
to do this. People who indeed are trying to fraud you, will give you at
least a suspicious reaction to your question. In this world, it is quite
normal to identify ourselves during official situations, so what's the
problem to identify yourself in this situation?
Another way to do a 'check' in a nice way, is to ask her home address
and send her
flowers
or a gift by an
international flower/gift delivery service, they always can take a photo
at the moment she will receive your flowers or gift and this service
will send you the photo. Using this method you will have a check on her
address and if the woman who is receiving this is the same you are
writing. Also in this example, people who are trying to fraud you, will
never allow themselves to be on a picture or give their real home
address. They will use some excuse why they are not on the photo.
Tip 9
Don't get paranoid
Don't
get paranoid about this, just be careful
and use your common sense.. Like I started this subject, it's
just a minority who will try to play (financial) tricks with you. If you want
to read more about this subject,
then continue reading our this article about Dating scams or visit the links in this page and you will read
many interesting
and useful topics about this matter.
Internet
(dating) Scams, what is this, how big is the risk, can this happen to me,
how to prevent this. All questions thousands of people and more ask
themselves.In
any kind of internet business (where money is involved) there are certain
risks what we call in general Internet scam or fraud. In this topic we only are talking
about scams in the Internet Dating and Marriage-world.
For
me, there is only one definition
"Trying to get or steal money from people, or
misuse you to get a staying permit (green card) under false pretexts, using misinformation, deception, fraud or even
(emotional) blackmail"
When you are looking for a (Russian) woman
you have to deal with many situations
where (your) money can be involved.
It
already starts from the beginning of your search process till the moment you
will meet her for the first time and until the moment you are starting a
procedure to get your fiancée to your country.
Please, be very careful when you want to spend money 'outside' reliable
and verifiable services. In any case, never send money to a individual or
single person you don't now or never have met in person.
In
any kind of the above products, there will be ‘organizations’ that will
try to let you pay 2 or 3 times more than necessary. In the worst case, there
will be ‘organizations’ or individuals that will try to sell you just
‘clean air’, if you know what I mean. In other words, you pay a lot of
money with your credit card or Western Union money transfer service and you
will receive…nothing!
This
can happen not only to you, but also to your Fiancée who will be still in
Russia during the complete process, until she finally will be permanently in
your country.
Your
fiancée or girlfriend has also to deal with (official) matters, that will be new and
unknown for her, and in Russia there are many, many people who are waiting for
her to ‘help’ her. They will promise her everything to make things go
faster and ‘cheaper’ for her, if she will use their 'special' services, of
course for a lot of money, and finally she will get nothing. One of the
most 'popular' service these organizations can do for her is arranging 'magic'
US entry visa's.
To be short about this, there is no other organization in Russia then the official
US Embassy or Consulate, that can provide your Fiancée a visa to travel to
the US.
Even
I had an experience of a kind of fraud:
In 1998, I paid a lot of money for
a professional photographer and a signing up fee to put my photo's on the website of a certain Russian dating
agency in Moscow (it's not existing anymore). Until today, I still have to wait
till they will publish my photo's. I contacted many times with this
'Agency', but they denied that they received my photo's and money and
the contact person, I was referring to, was not working in this
office!
These things can happen to your girlfriend too.
Always advise your girlfriend that if she need any services of an Agency
(ex. email forwarding, translation etc.), then be certain that she will go to
an Agency that is absolute reliable.
This is just one of the many possible 'fraud' situations you or your
Fiancée can be involved in. This happens almost every day in Russia
Before
I will give you some more details about all the (financial) items I mentioned
above, I will give you first some more explanation about some facts you first
should know.
The
above question is one of the most asked questions in this
Russian-women-dating world, because this fact can make you already a little
suspicious, isn’t it?
Ok,
I will give you some background information you should know:
First
some figures:
-
In
Russia there live about 140 million people (source
CIA-World
Factbook)
-
About
100 mln are between the age 16 – 65 years old.
-
From
this 100 mln, 58% are men and 52% are women. Yes, you are right, there
are more men in Russia than women, at least in this age category. Above
the age of 65, there are more women than men.
-
The
average age of a Russian man is about 64 and a Russian woman 74%
-
Most
of the people in Russia live in, or close to, big cities.
So
why are Russian women, looking for a 'foreign' man
The
above question has more than one answer, I will give you a few:
-
In
Russia it is (part of the Russian culture) normal that women marry very
young. They already marry from age 18, most of the women are married between
18 and 23 years and they sometimes already have 1 or 2 children too. If a
Russian woman is not married before 25, then she will be considered as
'strange' or weird. Another reason is that very young Russian women very
early starts 'hunting' for their future husband, because they are afraid to
be left alone, that they will be too old if they are not in time (to find a
husband). Because of this reason you also will see that many Russian women
already are divorced at a (comparing to Western standards) very young age.
Being divorced in Russia is not a good start to find another man in Russia.
All these reasons has everything to do with the Russian culture. Just
'living together' is sometimes not a possibility in relation to the Russian
culture. If two young people want to live together, then they should be
married first. For this reason, Russian women are looking for a foreign men
with possible marriage. To be married first or being officially engaged, when living together,
is still very important for a Russian woman. You really must respect this part of their culture. Don't try to convince her that 'living
together' is almost the same as 'married together', because in Russia it's
not the same.
-
Another
important reason is, that at this moment, young Russian people start to
change their 'old' culture customs. Especially young Russian men are waiting
longer before they are thinking about marriage. This fact gives the young
Russian woman a reason to look 'somewhere else', because they are afraid
that when the Russian men is ready for marriage, there will be not enough
men for her to 'choose'. The young Russian woman doesn't want to wait for
this.
-
A
next very important reason is, that many Russian men have no job, no money,
no future and as a result for that, drink a lot, which causes many
decease's, and unfortunately, many Russian men will die too early (read the
above figures).
-
For
the Russian women, this is not an acceptable situation or future she is
waiting for.
-
Concerning
a certain age-group among the Russian women, you can say that Russian women
between the age 30 and 45 are condemned to stay alone. There is almost no
Russian man who is looking for such an 'old' woman. I know it sounds crazy,
but unfortunately, it's true.
-
Another
possible reason is the fact that Russian women don't have any faith in the
economical future of Russia, although the Russian economy is recovering
slowly, for the Russian women, it's developing too slow. Russian women are
in general high educated persons and hard workers and they also want to use
their education in a normal economical atmosphere. Russia still has a long
way to go to accomplish this and the women have not enough time to wait for
this, because in time they will be too old to find a man.
-
The
final reason for women who are looking for a foreign man, is a combination
of the above. The economical reason in combination with finding a
trustful foreign husband.
The
good ones:
In
general all Russian women are looking for a trustful, reliable,
healthy and respectful husband who lives a normal life under normal
circumstances with an acceptable financial living standard to support a
family under normal conditions. I use the word 'normal' many times, I want
to express that these women are not specific looking for rich men. They
don't need 2 cars, a TV in every room, 2 boats, 2
houses and 5 times a year a holiday. But
they are also not looking for a man who likes to drink a lot or uses drugs
now and then or don't have enough means to support a family or is just lazy,
or being only a housekeeper after he finally married her.
And they certainly are not looking for a one time adventure.
Maybe
you ask yourself why Russian women sometimes write down these specific
qualifications. For me this answer is very easy. If you meet some woman in your
'own' neighborhood, she will find out by herself how you are living, what
kind of man you are, what kind of job, hobbies, interests you have, how you
clean your house is and how you iron your shirts.
But
for Russian women this is more difficult, she only can 'know' these things
because you are 'writing' this to her. She actually cannot 'see' it by
herself, she lives too far away for just a short visit (which for the US is
impossible to do), to see e.g. how you
decorated your house to get an impression of your life style. For this
reason, Russian women will ask you many times about these things, and if
not, you should tell her these things by yourself. These items are very
important for her, because she needs to create the right or correct image of
the man she intends to live with.
The
one's that might (aware or unaware) disappoint you:
But
unfortunately there is also a very small group of (most of the times very
young) Russian women who only are looking for a 'ticket' (green card) to the
US or other Western country. Most of these young women are even not aware
of the 'impossible' future they try to create. You can recognize these women if you have a
normal knowledge of human character. These women doesn't want to take
month's before they want to meet you (preferable in your country and without
detailed knowledge about what kind of man you are), also these women don't mind at all if you are
20 years (or more) older than they are. And usually they will not talk or
write about very profound personal interests or very private
matters. In fact they act sometimes like high school girls, are already
writing that they love you in their third letter and are not
afraid to talk about money. They will often tell you that they are really
looking forward to 'live in your country', instead of saying 'living with you'.
It is not self-evident that these women are 'scams', they are just too young
to know that most of these large-age-difference relationships not always work
out as they expect to be.
The
first line I wrote to my current husband was:
"I
am not looking for a new country to live in, I am looking for a compatible partner
to live with"
Please
be careful, especially this category of young women can be 'dangerous' for
you. They can make your head going out of control. Imagine, a 21 beautiful
young woman, a really knock out, who is in love
with an 43 year old western man. If this will ever happen to you,
please ask yourself, why this very young woman is attracted to a much older
man? After that, ask her the same question and try to evaluate her answers
about this fact, and talk with others (e.g. your friends or family) about
this, maybe these people, who are close to you, can help you to keep your both feet on the ground.
Of
course there are many examples that this age difference really can work, but
to be honest and not to discourage you, I interviewed different Russian
women about this subject and they all answered that they in general prefer
men of their own age. Of course they don't mind reasonable age difference
(more than western women do), but like I said, in an acceptable way. My
husband is 9 years older than me and I have no problem with
that, beside that, we both have reached an age (above 35) that we made our
decision based on mutual mature life experience. There is a big
difference between an age difference for example, she 20 and you
40 then for example, she 35 and you 55.
Just try to keep it within reasonable age
difference, I thought you are looking for a Russian 'wife' and not for a
'daughter'?
How can I recognize these kind of 'women'?
-
These
women are most of the time very young comparing to your age
-
She
tells you how nice it would be to live in your beautiful 'country', instead
of telling you how nice it would be to live with 'you''.
-
she
starts very soon writing about items like 'I want to visit you' (instead
of inviting you to Russia) and that she (already) loves you and hardly can
wait to meet you in your country.
-
she
tells you about her dreams to be on your white beaches, instead of the
cold in Russia.
-
In
general, she wants to come to your country very soon, but not for you as
the main reason.
The
real bad 'guys':
And
there are also women and men who work in an organized way. They almost never 'work'
alone and can be very convincing to you that they will be the perfect wife
for you. In fact these 'women' are often 'men' faking like you are
corresponding with a real woman. But sometimes it also can be a real woman
who is trying to fraud you. I know a story of a man who visited a woman (after she invited him)
for the first time in Ukraine (but this also can be Russia or other CIS
country) and this woman arranged for him (with help of some 'friends') an
apartment and other practical matters. Then she showed him a lot of fake
(very expensive) bills and asked him to pay her. When he didn't want to pay
this crazy and unacceptable amount of money, she blackmailed him by
threatening him to go to the local police, if he didn't want to pay her. Of
course he had no choice, because you never know how many people are involved
in this kind of 'fraud' and he never would have had any chance or even
worse.
How can I recognize these kind of 'persons'?
In many ways, but I give you a few identifications:
-
she
started to write you first
-
she
tells you how nice it would be to live in your beautiful 'country', instead
of telling you how nice it would be to live with 'you''.
-
she
starts very soon writing about items like 'I want to visit you' (instead
of inviting you to Russia) and that she (already) loves you
-
she
doesn't write, in a comprehensive detailed way, about her personal life
and private matters
-
she
doesn't give you her or another phone number and her postal address (which
you can check easily)
-
she
gives you hints about money issues (tell you how expensive a visa is, or
tickets are and that she can not afford this or that she and her family
has not enough money to live from, etc.)
-
she
starts to ask you money for her preparation to visit you and tells you
that she can get help from a local (travel) agency, or she tells you she
need money for Internet access or whatever.
-
her
letters are very impersonal, except the words she uses to express her love
for you, but this is her main 'weapon'.
Note: A single identification doesn't automatically means that she is a 'scam',
but more than 3 combinations is enough information to start to be cautious. But any 'money' issue, especially if she is asking for it or if she takes
the initiative to talk about money, is considered as an important
identification of possible scam.
Certainly not! these were only some examples of possible fraud of a very small
part of Russian women (or men) who are at the wrong site of the Internet dating
World. Does it scares you? Please don't, it's only a minor part (0.5%) of
the total Russian women who are trying to find a new partner. Don't get
paranoid about this, you can do many things by yourself to avoid a possible
scam and if you do it right, it doesn't need to cost you a lot of money.
Always
try to be positive, don't think that behind every corner there will be
someone waiting for you to get rid of your money. And do not forget that
many Russian women are afraid for the same thing too. It's not only the
'women' who are trying to 'play' with men, there are a lot of weird Western
men too, who just are looking for some 'action' or a one time adventure with
a beautiful Russian girl or woman and just drop them like dirt when they
don't need them anymore. One of my best (Russian) friend has had this kind
of experience with an American man. So, both parties (man and woman) will be
insecure and cautious, before they 'open' themselves completely to each
other.
Hire
yourself a very good private detective, pay $200,- an hour and hire a second
private detective to check the first P.I. (you'll never know).
Ok,
I know this sounds stupid, but this could be a 'safe' way to start your journey
to find yourself a trustful and reliable woman.
But...
If
you are looking for a cheaper and also safe way:
Don
not lose you common sense and use
your common knowledge of human character and always keep both feet on
ground
Many men lose their heads if they see a picture of a real knock-out,
especially if this knock-out is interesting in him. It looks like they
are drugged and it will take away their 'feelers' that should warn him
when he scents 'danger'. The world looks pink to him and walks on
clouds, but he doesn't notice that he is already taking his wallet to
help this young beautiful woman who lives in such a 'cruel' world called
Russia. Ok, I know I am exaggerating, but be warned, this kind of people can
really use very credible stories to convince you their reliability, by
using very dirty tricks. Forgive me for saying this, (but I am a woman
and allow myself to say this) men in general can be very naive during
moments they should be very attentive.
Read
her letters like it is your employment contract
I receive often questions of men who are suspicious
about their current contact with a lady. When I start to ask more
information about the correspondence and receive copy of letters, I very
often can recognize possible scam. You should do this too, just to
'learn' how these people write their letters.
Ask
the woman to explain to you why she likes you and what she is really looking for.
This question can be very important for you. You can judge from her
answer if it sounds acceptable, or reasonable or not. Skip the superlatives
in her answer and try to read 'between' the lines. Especially when there
is a big age difference between her and you, her answer can be of great importance
of your possible suspicious thoughts about her. read carefully if she is
talking about you and not your country, if you know what I mean. If you
are a man over 45, bold, having a small overweight belly and smoking
cigars and she is beautiful and only 24 years young, then never accept
her answer that you are so handsome. Be honest with yourself. If she
really likes you (which of course is possible) then she really must give
you a very good and above all, realistic and acceptable reason to
explain to you why.
Ask
her things about her private life, family, friends, work, postal
address, birth date, phone numbers etc.
People who try to fraud you, don't like to give a
way such sensitive information. Because they know you easily check this
information.
Ask
some specific questions in your letters and check if she really gives
answers on your specific questions.
If people indeed are trying to fraud you, then you
are not the only one they are corresponding with.
They often use pre-printed text and after the second and third letter
they use similar text which can be used for other men too. Of course
some answers are answers on your questions you send to here, but it is
important to read 'how' they write their answers and what kind of
'English' they use.
If
she starts to talk about 'money'
Don't get paranoid at once. It depends
in what way she is talking about money. And, more important, in what
phase of your relationship with her, are you both in. Supporting her
financially, for only matters related to e.g. her visit to you, or to
start the immigration process, is quite normal. If the woman has no
financial means for herself than you should help her. But never send her a penny before you ever met her in person!
They can be very convincing to you why she needs money. It can start
with a few dollars to pay her Internet fees for emailing you, or she can
talk about money for the phone at the post office. Jut don't send money
to her. First visit her and see if you both really have (or can have) a
serious relationship. During this trip you will know each other better,
after this trip the risk of scam is less present (or downgraded to zero)
than it was before you met each other in person.
Our advice related to your first meeting with her
Go to
her country and spend as long time as possible with her. In this way you are
the one who controls all the expenses to visit her, like applying for a
visa, arranging tickets, hotel reservation etc. Be sure, it's you who is
doing all these arrangements. Never let her do any arrangements for you,
by sending her money. It is not too difficult to do this all by yourself
or use an official travel Agency who will do that for you. If you read
all the pages of our web site, you will find many information about the
'First Meeting'. If not enough, just write us and we will try to help
you.
But if she starts to talk about sending money, even before you both ever
met each other, then don't do anything. If she starts to talk about her
'ill mother' or that she has no money to buy enough food, or if she has
to support her complete family, than don't respond to this by sending
money. This issue we also submitted to the different Russian women we
interviewed for several questions. They all answered that they never would write or
talk (by the phone) about such very private things. Even if it is true,
that their life circumstances are bad, they never would talk about it,
especially not to a person they never met in person before . Russian
women have their pride too. Of course this is different when you already
married her (or almost) and of course, if she is living with you, she
wants to help her family, if possible. But talking about it before you
ever met her, no, they never will do that.
Always explore your relationship (and her life) situation in her
country, before doing such things. I am sure that after visiting her for
a few weeks in her country, you will find out if this relationship is
serious or not and if she is really serious and above all, reliable or
not. The 'First meeting' is very important, it will give both of you a
reason to continue your relationship or not. It should give you an
answer if you both will take an important 'next step'. If you both are
still doubting, after you returned, than it's still not a solid 'base' to
send her money, if she is asking for it.
If you both need a 'second' visit to 'build' your relationship, than
again visit her country. Practically speaking, it's easier for you (and
even sometimes cheaper too) to visit her, than for her to visit you (ex. due to difficult visa regulations). If the woman will understand that you have no intentions to send her
money, and if she really has intentions to 'fraud' you, she will finally
give you an excuse to end this relationship. Women who have real intentions
to fraud you, have no time to keep themselves waiting a long time to get
your money. They try to get your money as soon as possible, otherwise
they know they will have the risk to get exposed. The police and other authorities in Russia are very active to fight
against these criminal practices.
Every
Agency, related to Internet dating, has many services you can buy or where
you have to pay for. There are different kind of issues you have to be
careful for. First I will try to explain different kind of possible scams,
fraud or misinformation.
Good
Agencies:
Most Agencies you really can trust. The women they
have in their databases are real, and most of the time checked by the
Agency itself. This kind of Agency asks many information about the woman
before they will publish here and they will confirm you that these women
have serious sincere reasons to meet you. Almost every Agency has
additional services to offer, like Phone or Letter Translations, Email
forwarding, Gift services and many more. You will see (after visiting a few Agencies) that prices
differ very much from each other. Always compare prices for the same
services between different kind of Agencies. If you have met a woman through
one of these agencies and you have reasons to believe
something is 'wrong' with this peculiar woman, then report this at one at
this agency. They always will help you to find out what is possible wrong.
If you want to know what good agencies are then visit our own
recommended
section of an absolute reliable agency. Or choose one of our programs
from the menu-item 'women' at the top or bottom of the page.
Suspicious or bad Agencies:
These
Agencies have the nasty habit to keep you as long as possible as a paid
customer. Or their prices for products are far too high, comparing to the
common professional agencies. This type of agencies also allow scammers easy
to be published in their directory. They can also ask money for translations
for the letters you write to the woman, if you don't pay, they don't let you
in contact with the woman. To be short, they can ask you money for services
you don't ask for. They also sometimes 'change' your letters to the lady if
you are using an email forward service, they do the same with the letters
from the lady addressed to you. using this method they try to keep you
longer as a paid email-forwarding customer.
Fake
Agencies:
These
are really the bad guys. These
'Agencies' can have really sophisticated web sites and it really looks like
a professional Agency with real beautiful women. The only problem is, they
sell nothing. The women they are using are just some nice photo's from
magazines or 'stolen' from real Agencies, but these women are not existing.
They ask money for almost everything and always have an excuse if you start
to ask sharp questions about their services. If you have contact with one of
the 'women' published at this agency, she probably will not start
asking about money. This part will be done by the 'owner' of the agency and
will talk about money on behalf of the woman you are corresponding with.
These 'managers' of this kind of agencies try to convince you that your
'lady' doesn't has money to pay for translation, phone costs, email
forwarding or visa to travel to the US (which as you have read earlier,
impossible for her to do) and ask you polite to do this for her.
You will recognize this kind of agencies easily.
How can I protect myself from Agency fraud:
There are several things what you can do, like this:
Visit the agency you have selected and try to find out what kind of agency
this is, read the 'about us' page and find out if the people who own this
agency are using normal postal addresses, or are registered as a real
agency. read about their services and the way they use their selection criterion
for accepting customers to be published in their database. It is quite
normal if you email the owner or contact persons to ask your specific
questions about their agency. Perhaps they have a "We Support Anti
Scam Program' banner at their page and you can ask them what they are
doing to prevent possible scammers in their database. Or they can use their
own method for an anti scam policy. Just ask them about it.
It is possible while browsing the Internet, that you see the same women
photos on different websites. This has nothing to do with scam. It means
that a specific website is part of a large network of Russian women dating.
These websites have the possibility to adjust their own house-style
(appearance of their website), but the women they present are often the
same. Two well-known and network or co-brand organizations are A Foreign Affair
and The Angelika network and they offer other's to use their network as a
co-brand website. Or you have websites who offer to place their ladies on
your website, like A Pretty Woman. The three network organizations I
mentioned are considered to be in the 'good' category.
Be realistic in choosing your Russian woman.
Do not look for a photo, look for a compatible partner, so read her profile
about what she likes and what her hobbies are and what 'she' is looking for!
. Her beautiful photo in a sexy outfit is just to compete against her female
'rivals'. But these ladies are certainly NOT desperate!
Perform a background check on the
woman.
But even when you are using the services of 'good' agencies, there always
can be a small chance that a certain woman is not the person you think she
is or that you think it is to beautiful to be true. Even when a woman has to
show the agency all her personal information, like name, family name,
fathers name, postal address, phone numbers, birth-date etc. it could be
possible that her intentions are different then you are looking for.
If you have made contact with a Russian woman and she makes a great
impression on you and she is also interested in you, consider to do a
background
check on the information she provided you. She never will know that you
did this and it will give you a more secure feeling about your starting
relationship. Performing a background
check will mean that
Michael Muinov, a
Russian lawyer who is specialized in background checks on Russian
virtual lovers, can find out things like:
-
Her real name
-
Her real age (date of birth)
-
If she is/was married before or single
-
If she has children
-
Her real home (postal) address
-
Phone numbers if connected
-
If she is working and where
For $US 149, we will dig through public records and answer all
those nagging questions you may have about your Russian Internet
date
Click
here to perform a background check or ask more information
Don't feel ashamed to do this, if many more men had done this before, it had
would had prevent them from a lot of disappointment and would saved them a
lot of money too.
Our
absolute reliable partner:
Elenas
Models: Meet the woman of your dreams
without frustrations and worries
If
you already have contact with a woman, keep our information about 'How
can I protect myself to unreliable women' in mind. Always use your
common sense and keep both feet on ground. Like I started this
chapter, the chance is very little, but possible.
We
will give you guidelines in the different phases of your final process
to get your woman into your country.
We
have written a very detailed chapter about
how
to find and marry a Russian women, we have written a lot of
information which can be a great help for you. We advise you to read
the whole chapter before taking any action.
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